What to do with the hard things in life
Posted on September 23 2009
Posted by:
Jane Prentice
Frequently I hear conversations around Ridley that people are struggling - a sibling is sick, a parent has died, a friend can't have children or has lost one, a parishioner is angry at childhood abuse, the bushfires ravaged so many homes, a fellow student struggles with sin, a family is caught in conflict, a son's marriage is falling apart, essay season is overwhelming, and on and on.
For me, the following has been a great list on the bathroom wall for some years, good perspective in the good times that I hope sinks in for the hard times. I've found when I'm tempted to look down, these thoughts remind me of some of the bigger pictures of suffering.
Maybe it could encourage you, or someone you know. It's a list written specifically for women, but I'm guessing much of it may encourage you men also, perhaps with some wording changes 
'What I do with the hard things in my life'
(Written for the Gospel Women Study at College Church by Mary Duvel, published in Barbara Hughes 'Disciplines of a Godly Woman', pages 243-244.)
(italics - my comments)
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Immerse myself in the word of God. His divine power has given me everything I need for life and godliness through the knowledge of Him (2 Peter 1:3).
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Realise: a) He is in sovereign control of all that concerns me, His child. Everything is sifted through his fingers first. b) God has given each of us our own race to run. We are to keep our eyes fixed on him and stay in our own lane, not comparing our lives or the life of someone we love to the lives of others (1 Cor 7:17, Heb 12:1-2). c) God does not give us grace for someone else's race. d) God does not ask us to understand his ways, but he asks us to trust him implicitly. He sees the whole, eternal picture. (I think God does reveal some of his ways in scripture such that we can understand them, so this is not blind trust, but trust based on knowing that he is trustworthy.) e) My lack of faith does not nullify his faithfulness (Rom 3:3). f) I am not the point, he is. It is not about me getting out of suffocating pain; it is about his Son being revealed in me, about God's image being released in me. (This idea is from 'Finding God' by Larry Crabb.)
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Yield to the instrument of refinement He has chosen in my life. God cannot fulfill His purpose in me when I am kicking and screaming.
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Confess that I don't know how to yield, that I am helpless and angry. God is big enough to take it.
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Confirm that I am willing to be taught in the midst of this pain and difficulty.
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Ask in the disappointment, loss, isolation, and pain that the Holy Spirit will teach me through the Word to trust God and understand who God is in all His mercy and love.
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Seek to walk in obedience through the storm and not waste my energy fretting.
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Know that the secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances. (This thought is from 'Keep a Quiet Heart' by Elizabeth Elliot.)
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Remain hopeful that through all of life's changes, we are secure in the knowledge that we will see his face and be fully satisfied. (Psalm 17:15).
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Press on to take hold of that for which Christ took hold of us (Phil 3:12, Acts 20:24)!
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